Yet
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: Paul goes through the darkest set of months in his life, but comes out better for it. - One-shot.


The water that drizzled from the shower head was, at best, lukewarm and did nothing to help clear his head. Still, Paul stood beneath it, eyes hardly shut. The sting this brought on not only felt justified but also gave him something new to focus on. Counting the cracks in the hotel shower stall tile could on distract a man for so long.

Pretty soon he'd get to thinking about... about…

It was all fucked up.

And also all his fault. It was only recently that he'd come too terms with that last part, but it was true. He'd gotten himself in this mess and now he had to withstand whatever came from it.

The thing was though, only about a week ago, things didn't seem so bad. He was still doing shady shit, but it hadn't come up to bite him in the ass just yet. It was still enjoying it's time in the shadows, where it all belonged. But now...now…

Stephanie started acting weird. We'll, weirder than, as a McMahon, she acted under normal circumstances. They'd been fucking around for a good the months by that point and, normally, she'd be jumping his bones the second he even mentioned being able to sneak off for a few hours with her. The woman seemed to he getting off on the allure of the secretiveness, if not just the thrill of being caught. Which was fine with him. Great with him, even. He couldn't explain it, had long given up on doing so. There was just something about Stephanie though that just... It was intoxicating. Less the exhilaration of keeping things under wraps and more, truthfully, just the woman herself. Stephanie was taking over his mind in some ways. He wasn't even sure how much she was really into him as opposed to just sticking it to her old man and, probably, the company itself in some ways. But him? He was completely enraptured by the woman.

It was strange. He wouldn't start he was in love with her, couldn't say that, really, but rather felt... Drawn to her. It has something to do with their story love, he was certain at first, and it probably had something to do with that, maybe, but it went deeper too. Ran deeper.

He thought he just needed to get it, get her, out of his system. It sounded bad, it sounded terrible, but his relationship, his real relationship, was getting rocky and he considered himself a faithful guy, if not a bit distant, but when you mix the bad influence of the company you keep with the fact a member of said company was the object of your desire, things got..

Steph was into him too. It was obvious. They could play it off as just work around others. Some bought it, some didn't, maybe. He never bought it though, even when he was uncertain of how he felt about the whole thing, he didn't buy that she wasn't digging him. And he knew it was bad, to toy with such a thing, when he was falling into such a dark place already, but…

If he just slept with her, he reasoned, he'd get it out of his system.

It was a terrible thing to think, to say, to feel, but it was the truth. HE honestly felt as if he could just get Steph alone for a bit, just be with her for a bit, then he'd get over the whole thing. That she'd get over the whole thing. That they could just work together and leave it there. Not even a friend with benefits thing. Just a quick fling, not even a weekends worth, and it would be over and they would be fine.

For some reason though, it just didn't work that way.

He recalled hinting around it, kind of, in a joking manner with the woman. Suggesting they should go out together. Just the two of them. And Steph was so into it. Like she'd been waiting on this. And he had meant to take her out. HE had. But somehow, they just wound up sticking around a hotel room and, well…

Well.

It was nice for the night and went and got them a pizza to share before taking off. It felt like it could have ended there with little repercussions. The next day, Steph was still being all flirty and shit. Which wasn't the problem. No. It could have been, of course, because she could have caused a huge mess about everything, but before she even had a chance, he caused the problem all himself.

He returned it.

Because the one and done hadn't done anything for him. At all. If anything, it made him want Steph all the more. He felt like he could hardly contain himself, in the ring that night, and probably was feeling up on her a bit more than he should have been. Not that she rejected this.

And fine. He considered himself a wonderful actor (he considered himself a wonderful everything) and Steph was alright, but who were they kidding? Maybe everyone else, but they both knew. They both knew everything.

It took a lot of rationalizing and some personal reflection, but over the years he'd more than started to blend with Hunter. Paul and Hunter didn't too different and Hunter definitely would have felt far less guilt than Paul was suffering from and, assuming no one would ever become any wiser about the situation…

He was an asshole. A terrible, cheating asshole.

But...he was getting to fuck Stephanie McMahon on the side and that did wonders to awash the guilt.

Things weren't always easy, of course. There were some close calls. And Steph sometimes was a major bitch about the whole thing. He was lying to her too, in some ways, just as much as he was his girlfriend, and it was a mess, but it was a manageable one.

What he was in now though…

So she'd begun to distance herself, Stephanie had. Him. Paul. He was the distant one, not her. She was a little too open, at times, even. So something was definitely up. Honestly, he thought that she was pissed about their relationship. She'd always kind of hinted around his lies and more or less knew what was going on, he was sure. She played like she didn't to feel better about it, but she knew. And she probably was tired of it.

Stephanie was becoming his most important person, but he understood her misgivings about lack of real validation. He just...he couldn't provide it. The entire thing was built on a house of cards. He couldn't let her start pulling them down one by one.

He had to talk to her. They had to talk together, rather. Seriously talk. If that's what was going on, he reminded himself that day he took note of her lack of interest. If that was the situation he was dealing with. Somewhere the pit of his stomach, he feared it was something worse.

What if...Steph just wasn't into it anymore? He didn't know the woman's history with men well, they hadn't been too close before they started...but he had a pretty good indication that she was the fall hard, get up fast type. HE didn't want her to get up from him. He didn't want to lose her yet.

But, of course, that brought up another issue. What was yet? What did that mean? If anything? This couldn't go on forever and he was having fun, currently, but… Steph had to be the one to break things off. For the situation to benefit him in any way. If he ended things with her, he was at the mercy of her judgment which, while liked the woman enough, was nothing to hang your hat on. She could string him up and get her dad on her side of things before he even had a chance ot defend himself. What they had going was indefinite, but definitely had to eventually find it's end.

Three months didn't feel near long enough for him, but if that's what Stephanie chose then...fighting it could only lead to a worse situation for him.

Really, it was all fucked form the start. That's what it goes back to. There was never a satisfying outcome to all this. All the guys he knew in the business, fuck, even Vince, slept around. It was just at hing. It happened. But of course him, he had to pick the one woman in the entire universe that could possibly ruin his entire career.

Maybe WCW would take him back…

He tried not to think of it, when he basically forced Steph to agree to meet with hima nd talk about things one night, but man, he was so worried about it. All of it. He wanted to stay with Steph, wanted his current relationship to be untouched, and also didn't want his career fucked with at all. He knew that it was impossible for all three to stay true after their conversation, but he did hold out for as many as possible staying intact.

How could he know that all three would wind up fucked in the end because of it?

"I'm pregnant."

And he choked. Literally. He was in the middle of taking a sip from his water bottle (confrontations made his throat dry) and it went down the wrong fucking pipe at her statement.

"You're what?"

They were in a hotel room and Steph was sitting there, on the end of the bed, just staring up at him. This had been because he'd gotten up to go grab his water bottle from across the room, but at her words, he just stood there in disbelief. Frozen, just about.

"I mean, I'm not certain, but-"

"Stephanie-"

"I haven't been to a doctor yet. I just… I peed on a stick or whatever and-"

"You can't be serious."

"Why would I joke about this?"

"Damn it, Stephanie-"

"I'm serious. I-"

"It's not mine." That's the first thing that popped into his head and he said it with rather clear confidence. "It's not. So...just fuck off with this. I don't-"

Her face darkened too and he'd never realized before ow much he hated her. Until right then. Wow.

"If I am, it is, so-"

"But it's not. And you're not. So-"

"I am. And you're-"

"You're not. You better not be, Stephanie. You hear me? You better-"

"Or what?'

He wasn't sure. But whatever it was, if it was inline with his thinking in that moment, it wouldn't be pretty.

Letting out a long breath then, he finally looked her dead in the eyes. He could see how upset she was and he knew, somehow he just knew, that she was telling the truth.

Somehow, it made it worse.

Instead of replying to her question however, he said, "I'm not your...whatever. This isn't my problem. It's yours. You hear me? I don't- No. Stephanie. You shouldn't have come and told me this shit. Has nothing to do with me."

"Uh, yeah, it does." Finally, she stood and it was rather clear she wasn't impressed. "If I'm pregnant then you're the-"

"If, and this is a huge if," he kept up because, somehow, he had moral high ground in all this. Or at least he pretend to. Wagging his finger and all at her. He was pretty close, honestly, to chucking the damn water bottle instead. "And it's by some impossibility mine-"

" _It is."_

"How do I know that? Huh? You're sleeping with me, you could be fucking the entire locker room!"

He let out a sharp breath too, a noise one, through his nose, while Steph only stared at him, silent, more taken aback by this statement, somehow, than all the others.

Finally, after shaking her head a few times, she only replied, "I can't believe me."

"Can't believe me? How? Huh? What do you believe? Did you think that I'd be happy about-"

"No!"

"Then-"

"But I didn't think you'd be an asshole like this. You think I'm happy? Now I have to figure some stupid excuse to go home, to see a doctor, and find out if I'm really-"

"If you are," he began once more, "Stephanie, then I don't want to hear about it. At all. Just...get rid of it." He gestured between the two of them then, with his free hand. "This...can't happen. And you know that. It's just going to fuck everything up. Did you go thorough college just to get saddled with a dumbass kid? And I sure as hell didn't work my ass off to get here, just so I can get fired from this damn company because of you."

He expected an explosion. Steph could get just as fiery and loud as him. Maybe even more so. But instead, all he got was another long stare, some shakes of her head, and then her turning, rather quickly to leave.

Nothing else.

Literally nothing else.

Steph didn't call, she didn't try to contact him in any way. Definitely not in person. She didn't show up at the house show two days later, which no one seemed concerned about and must have been worked out with her father or whatever (though he was certain her reasoning was far different from the one that Paul knew, no doubt). It was fine. She was just escorting him out to the ring.

And...if she was...preg… She shouldn't be in that environment anyways.

But she wasn't. And it didn't matter if she was. Because it wasn't his. But that didn't matter either. Because if she was and it was his, then it wouldn't be around to bother them for long anyways. Steph was smart. She'd do the right thing.

Only, as he stood in that shower, he didn't quite know what the right thing was anymore. Conflicted didn't even begin to describe it. There were so many different variables for how this would all play out. He didn't know how to properly react. He wanted to tell someone, tell anyone, but what was there to tell them? Especially if Steph did as he asked and, in the coming weeks, the problem wouldn't even exist anymore.

What else was there to talk about?

A lot.

There was a lot to talk about.

But the person he wanted to talk to would probably never speak to him again and her reasoning were probably justified.

He still felt wronged, somehow, in the whole matter, but with the clarity of a few days, he could see how his reactions were improper.

Even in the short amount of time he and Stephanie had been (somewhat) together, he'd picked u[p on a lot of her mannerisms and especially her insecurities. He knew at least a bit of her pathology. She'd probably freaked about this all, at first, no doubt, and then been forced to tell him about it. He'd been the one that drug it out of her, after all. She'd been avoiding him, no doubt trying to come to terms with things on her own. If he'd have given her space then…

Then what?

If she was pregnant, she was still pregnant. Their confrontation was just inevitable. The only right answer for the whole thing was...was what? Because he didn't feel too right, any longer, about Steph just 'getting rid of it' and the implication that went along with that. Not that, if it wasn't gotten rid of that he would feel good about having to tell his girlfriend or Vince or-

Shit.

His parents.

He was rather stuck with them, honestly. While they weren't extreme Catholics, Mass twice a day shit, they certainly would frown on the idea of him nto only living with one woman while getting another one pregnant, but also him not having any intention of marrying either of them. And ugh, if Steph...aborted the baby, because that's what he'd technically been hinting at, right? Well that was certainly out.

Without a question.

If they caught wind of that…

It felt a bit silly, honestly, even thinking of that. Maybe it was his own notions of what that implied with such an act, but honestly, he viewed that more as something teenagers or very young adults get, when they're unable to afford or properly care for a child. Not something too successful and affluent people have done because, what? Selfishly worrying about what it'll do to their careers. Although his stigma was probably based more in hypocrisy and stereotypes, honestly, as there'd been plenty of political people that ended up in his same situation. They had more to loose, maybe, than he and Stephanie did, but still.

Was financial success the only deterrent away from force an unwanted child into the world?

The question felt too large, honestly for him to answer alone. Not to mention, kind of one sided. He didn't get to choose for Stephanie what she felt on the matter (though he found it hard to believe she wanted a kid with him anymore than he didn't with her). It wasn't even that he didn't want kids, because eventually, yeah, he saw his life trending in that direction, but at the moment? No. No way.

And especially not with someone he hardly knew.

He was at an impasse. Because no matter what he decided, he still had his girlfriend and work to toss into the mix and that would never end up right and it was just all so...so…

Wrong.

What he and Stephanie had been doing was wrong and now they had something to shove in their faces to show them that. They had been the ones sneaking around and doing things they shouldn't have been. What they were tasting at the moment was their just desserts and, surprise, they were bitter.

Very, very bitter.

And a tad sour as well.

He figured when he'd speak to Steph next time, he'd ask her to hold off on telling anyone anything. So he could speak to his girlfriend first and foremost. Then, together, they could speak to Vince (assuming he was still a whole person after the no doubt fury that was going to be released on him at home). Whatever happened after all that…

He'd didn't want to be with Stephanie. Not in that capacity. Yet. But if she really was having his baby…

He'd have to do the right thing. Wouldn't he?

But it was harder to find Stephanie than he thought. She stayed away until the next live show and, even then, seemed to be avoiding him backstage. As best as she could, of course, because considering the close proximity in which their characters interacted, it was a bit difficult. When he did run into her, she acted cool to him, and kind of forced him to corner her a bit, to finally get some answers.

"Steph, we need to talk," he grumbled to her in a hallway as she tried to pass him. "Seriously. Now-"

"About what?"

"Stephanie-"

And she groaned some, in a petulant way, and wow, was it hate?

She was so annoying.

It was a bit difficult to find an empty room, but the second they did, he locked the door behind them and then it was just the two of them, again, sneaking around. But now, it didn't feel as great.

"So?"

"So what?"

"Stephanie-"

"You told me," she complained as she stood there, arms folded over her chest, glaring so heavily at him, "that you didn't want me to bring it up again. So why do you care so much? Huh?"

"You know I didn't mean that."

"Why do I know that? You told me to get rid of it and-"

"Keep your voice down."

"Don't ask me to talk to you if you don't like the volume at which I speak, Hunter."

Great. So he was Hunter again.

Groaning, he rubbed some at his head and walked passed her, further into the room then. Over his shoulder, he said, "Well, we're going to have to get on the same page now, alright? I don't want you to get rid of it. There? Are you fine now? So what's next? Because first I have to talk to-"

"There's nothing to talk about."

He froze too, a bit, stricken it seemed just as heavily as he had been when she first told him. Turning to look at her, his eyes widened as he only whispered, "You didn't...already...did you?"

"No, stupid." Her arms fell a bit and she didn't seem nearly as upset as him. Shrugging her shoulders some, she only remarked, "I'm not… I wasn't...pregnant."

And that threw him for a pretty serious loop.

"You're not?"

"Now who needs to keep their voice-"

"Stephanie." He growled that bit too as he stalked back over to her. "If this has been some kind of a...joke, then-"

"It's not."

"How-"

"It was a false positive. The pee stick thing." She rubbed awkwardly at one arm as she refused to look at him. "I missed because I've been so sick and since I missed and was feeling so sick- Probably from that stupid takeout you made me eat the other day-"

"Stephanie-"

"Some of the medications I take fucked with the test reading and voila. We're here."

They were. With a mass of mixed emotions.

He wanted to yell at her. Again. But held off. He wanted to hug her. Again. But he held off. He wanted to cry. For the first time. Because it was so wonderful to hear that your entire lie wasn't about to be parade in front of your peers.

He just barely held that one off.

"So there. Are you fine now?" Stephanie sounded exasperated by the whole thing. "It's over. We're over. Can we get back to- Don't touch me."

She dodged him too when he reached out, finally, to at least pat her on the shoulder. Frowning once more, he said her name in confusion, but she only shook her head.

"You think I wanna be around you?"

He still didn't quite understand. "What are you talking about?"

"You're an asshole, Hunter."

"Paul."

" _Hunter_." Again, he got a shrug from the woman before she turned. "I have to get back to work."

"Steph, don't be like that," he called after her. "Didn't you want this too?"

Of course she had.

But what she didn't want any longer was him.

Which considering they still had a scene out in the ring to take care of wasn't too feasible, but outside of that, he couldn't get her to talk to him again that night. He should have been ecstatic, regardless, because the thing that had kept him up for days and caused him to lose his lunch more than once was no longer an issue, but…

"Why won't you talk to me?"

This is what he asked her, Stephanie, when he finally did manage to actually corner her once more. It was at a house show and he waited for her, at her car, in probably the most suspicious way possible. But he had to know. He had to talk to her.

She'd told him to fuck off, at first, but then he claimed her to be his only ride back to the next town and please, please, don't make him find another way. He'd pay her, even. Not just gas either. Either she took pity on his desperation or really had somethings to get off her chest because the woman unlocked the car with a long sigh.

It was then that he asked that and, in the simplest way possible, Stephanie answered.

"Because I don't like you anymore."

He'd been fidgeting with her CDs, trying to find the right one for the moment, but silence seemed to suit them best as, at her words, he only sat the stack back in the compartment beneath the stereo.

"Just because I didn't want to have a baby with you?"

That got him a look too, though just as quickly she was glaring back at the road, steering wheel gripped in her hands.

"No," Stephanie replied darkly. "I don't want a baby with you either."

"Then-"

"I don't like you because you blamed me and berated me and acted as if I was some horrible person because of something that, not only did I not have any control over, but you were just as culpable in causing too."

He didn't like that retelling of events. At all.

"I was upset, Stephanie."

"Yeah, well, look where it got you."

He only shook his head. "You don't understand. If you'd been pregnant, I lose everything. I lose my job, my friends, my...girlfriend. Everything would have been shit. For you too. Not just me. The baby wouldn't have… It was best this way."

"It is," she agreed. "I'm not stupid, you know. I didn't try and get pregnant. I'm not trying to 'trap you' or whatever the fuck you thought was going on. You're literally no benefit to me. You understand that. Right? None whatsoever. You think I want my father knowing that I'm sleeping with people in the locker room? I don't. And I'm not, by the way. Ass."

"I know that, Steph."

"Then you shouldn't have said otherwise."

"I was upset."

"If that's the way you treat me when you're upset with me, then I don't want to be around you."

"Stephanie," he complained. "That's not fair. You know that's not fair."

"How, huh? If that's how you act under stress-"

"Then we won't be under stress again. We haven't been other than that. I just… I freaked," he admitted. "I freaked out and I said some things that I shouldn't have, fine, but fuck, Steph. We were fine before. We were having fun before. Let's just pretend like this past week hasn't happened."

But he couldn't get her gaze again.

"Fix your real relationship. This isn't fun for me anymore."

Then he was stuck in a fucking car with her for another forty minutes. Poor planning on his part, for sure.

What got him the most, honestly, was how removed Stephanie acted towards the whole thing. From the beginning. He didn't think that, you know, that she loved him or anything, but she had thought that they were at least a little bit attached to one another. The way she was treating him, however, felt as if she didn't care at all. He hated to say it, but it did hurt.

They were a fling. Something that shouldn't be spoken about. Something they kept hidden. It was always meant to eventually come to an end. To find that yet. And she was upset, he could tell, in some way, but she was willing to ignore it and they could just part.

That's what they had to do. Eventually.

Right?

He did know one thing though. If this had taught him anything.

Steph or no Steph, it was time to do something, seriously do something, about his current, malfunctioning, relationship.

It wasn't easy. But it had been a long time coming.

In the weeks that followed, Stephanie was awkward and he wasn't happy about having to be around her so much, but things kind of leveled out. Kind of.

Until…

Until that horrible night where he blew his quad.

It was the most excruciating pain he'd ever been in. And man, he'd been in some pain before. But this was on an entirely different level. They set him up with some pain pills and a hotel room for the night, with the intention to fly him out to Alabama to the specialist in the morning.

He thought his life was over.

Everyone else left, eventually, all the guys, but Steph stayed, for some reason, with him in the hotel room. He didn't make a fuss about it and, ocne they were alone, she only sat there, on the edge of his bed, staring at him as he tried hard not to grimace too much.

"People'll talk. You stay here too long."

"They've been talking. Since you told your girlfriend all about us."

"Ex. And a lot went into that, yeah, but I told her you had nothing to do with any of that."

Still, she only shrugged some before whispering, "I thought I'd never be afraid like that again. When It thought I was… But when I saw how hurt you were….how much pain you were in… I'm so sorry, Paul."

He wasn't feeling well enough, to revel in the fact she'd referred to him as his true name, but it was noted. Shaking his head some, he only shut his eyes and muttered, "You didn't do anything, Steph. Neither did I. Sometimes things happen. That's all."

She hummed in response then said, "Do you know how hard it was? To go through all that? I really thought I was going to have to tell my father that… I'm sorry. I know that I'm talking about myself when you're laying here, worried about surgery-"

"It's not surgery that I'm worried about."

And it wasn't.

It was something much worse.

"I shouldn't have yelled at you though," he kept up. "I shouldn't have made you feel so alone. I'll get it, I guess, soon. What alone is. When I'm stuck at home for the rest of forever-"

"I'll call you," she kept up, sitting up tall then. "Everyday."

"Steph-"

"And I'll visit. I'll tell you everything. Everyone hates me here-"

"They do not."

"They don't like me, at least. They all think that I'm only here because I'm Vince's daughter. Like I don't belong."

"Yeah, well."

He got a bit of a look, but his eyes were shut and he didn't see it. Only felt her heavy gaze.

"Everything was just too complicated, for us," she sighed. "These past few weeks not speaking with you have been terrible. I wish I'd been a better friend to you."

"I'm dead, Stephanie."

"Feels like it."

It was his turn to hum. "Them all standing over me, all solemn and shit. That's exactly what it was like. My parents will be even worse. Shit. Shit. I fucking hate this, Stephanie. I hate it all. If this is it, if this is how my career ends, then what the fuck was it all for? Huh? Shit. Shit."

"You'll be back, Paul."

'Steph, shut up. I won't. There's no way. There-"

"I know you will." And she was moving then, getting up so that she could gingerly come crawl into bed with him. "I can feel it. Can't you? When you get back-"

"If I get back."

"When-"

"And even if I do, everyone will have moved on and forgotten-"

"I'll make sure they won't."

"Why would you do that? Huh?"

She reached out to run a finger along his jawline and Paul opened his eyes, meeting hers in the darkness.

Instead of answering, she only replied, "Let's be together. Paul. Like we were."

"You'll be gone. On the road."

"I'll be around. I'll be around so much you'll get tired of me."

He didn't believe her. But he didn't feel like talking about it anymore.

So they didn't.

Until the day after his surgery when Steph still hung around, in his new hotel room, the one he'd be confined to soon enough, as he began his extensive rehab term that could possibly end with him never stepping foot in the ring again.

The whole thing was depressive and sad.

So they didn't talk about it.

They talked about something equally as depressive and sad.

"I wasn't going to even tell you, you know."

"If you were pregnant?" he asked with slight agitation as they sat there, together, on his hotel bed.

"Before I knew for certain," she clarified. "I just felt so ill and I missed my… You really don't wanna hear about all this."

"I really don't."

"But you made me talk to you. You wanted me to tell you. So...I did. Maybe that was the wrong thing to do."

He shrugged some, as he sat up against the headboard. "I mean, I'd rather you didn't, since you weren't, but it wasn't the end of the world. I'm the one that did something he shouldn't have."

Steph's face dropped some and, looking away, she said, "You really hurt me."

"You hurt me. Breaking up with me and all."

"You can't break up with someone who's not really with you."

"Well," he tried then. "Can you really be with me now?"

Steph frowned, eyes finding his again, before saying, "What does that even mean? Huh? We can be friends, for now, and that would probably be-"

"I don't wanna be friends, Steph. Not right now. I need someone." Then he shook his head. "Not someone. You. I want you so much. I've wanted you. This whole time, I tried to deny it, tried to keep it light and then tried to just turn it off all because I was terrified that if I didn't that I would lose my job or… And look. I lost it anyways. I might as well have, at least. When you told me you were pregnant, I thought so many things, Steph, but I never thought of you. I treated you terribly, that night, but it was just one night. If you give me a chance, if you just let me try, I'll never do anything like that again. Ever. We're so good together. When we're together. So let's just...let's be together. Please, Stephie. Let's be together. Really together. Fuck everyone else. I've probably already lost them. I just want you. You're the one here. Not them. Doesn't that mean something?"

"What would you have done?" she asked instead of answering. 'If I was pregnant? Really. What?"

"I dunno, Steph. I thought a lot about it and I fucking don't know still. I know what I should have done, maybe, probably, but I don't know. Could you imagine? With my leg all fucked up know, could you imagine if we had that going on too?"

"Couldda just rehabbed to be a stay-at-home dad."

He made a face. "Don't even joke about that."

"I wanna be with you, Paul, but-"

"Then just be with me, Steph. Just give me a shot. How could I fuck it up, huh? Stuck here for months on end?" He reached out then, as she sat before him. Stroking her cheek, he said, "Only good thing to come out of this would be you."

"I don't wanna be that hurt again, Paul. That's all."

Nodding, he said, "I promise. Never again. I fucked up. I got scared. But I have it all now. Life without what I was afraid of losing. I get it, Steph. Losing it wasn't the end of the world. Losing you wouldn't be either. But...if I can only have one right now then..."

"And what about when you get back into the ring?"

"If."

"When." She was insistent that time. "When you get back to work, then what? Are we just gonna…"

"We don't have to worry about that yet."

"You don't have to worry about that yet. But I do. That's all I'll be able to think about. I like you, Paul. I think I could love you. But I'm not going to try if you're not ready to commit the same way to me. Not again. Not this time."

He looked down at the bed for a few moments before asking, "What if I try? Try real hard? Can we then? Be together then? Huh? Steph? What if I promise that...that… There is no yet. When or if the ring stuff, the locker room stuff, comes back up I'll still be with you. I'll seriously be with you. I'll call your father. Right now. Tell him everything."

"Not everything."

"Almost everything," he agreed. "I'll tell the world. I just need you. You make me so happy, Steph. You've been the only one that really makes me happy in a long time. I need that happiness now. And when all the shit from work that'll pile up tries to drown me. Don't you need me too?"

She didn't verbalize it. She didn't have to. Her nod was enough. And the kiss she leaned in to press against his lips was just over kill.

But Steph had to leave. She always would. For the next few months, that's what he'd have to deal with. He was stuck and she wasn't. She got to live the dream and he didn't.

And it was all fucked. But it had been fucked. If anything, it was a little less fucked these days. At least he didn't feel any sort of immense guilt any longer. Just a sick anticipation mixed with anxiousness as time ticked away and, eventually, hopefully, he'd be back where he belonged. He'd be Triple H again. He'd be a superstar again.

But until then, he had to say, there were a lot of worse ways to slowly die of boredom and monotony. Ones that didn't include calls each night and almost every morning from the only woman you actually wanted to hear from. Just took a bit of turmoil for you to realize it was all.

"I can't wait for you to get back," Steph said all cheerfully over the phone when things were more set in stone and he was getting ready to leave Alabama to finish his rehabbing at home up north. "Paul. Nothing's been the same without you."

"Yeah." And he grinned, even knowing all the shit that was going to happen, in the locker room, outside of it, just from everyone constantly over everything when he got back. Steph kept reminding him though not to worry about that. Not just yet, not at all. He'd already conquered the darkness months of his life. The biggest trials. Nothing else could come close to what he'd gone through. Nothing. "Me neither."

* * *

 **This was a request for a pregnancy scare when they were still sneaking around about their dating. So here. I dunno how I really feel about this one. I liked parts of it, tried to improve others, but the flow just felt off to me. Hope you guys liked it, anyways.**


End file.
